Monday, April 9, 2012

All Clear...

Hooray, we just received the all clear.  Brian is free of all diseases and his swimmers are healthy and numerous.  We just need to send the information over to SCI and then on to the next step.  Is it just me or does it seem like time is going really s...l...o....w.....l.....y.......

If time goes this slowly even before we get pregnant I can't imagine what it is going to be like waiting 9 months for the baby to arrive.

Yikes!

Sunday, April 8, 2012

Important Delivery

Well, I had quite a day yesterday.  It was deposit day to see if Brian's swimmers are still swimming.  I didn't think I would be worried about it, but now I am - because I have put too much thought into it.

Thought one: ever since becoming a parent it seems as if he has had a bullseye right over his most important parts.  Little league, backyard piƱata, tennis lessons - how much punishment can a man take before it stops working all together?  Friday - the day before our appointment, I am in the backyard planting lettuce and all I hear is "Dad, you okay?"  I get up and see Brian doubled over because where did the tennis ball go after being hit by my son's whiffle ball bat - you got it, right towards that invisible bullseye!

Thought two:  Brian turned 40 a few months back.  I am a few years older than he is - and when I turned 40 it seems like everything started going wonky.  All I can picture in my mind is an illustrated picture of a sperm that looks freakishly similar to Mr. Magoo.  Sorry, honey! I can't help the way my twisted mind works - it might be the stress!

There are more thoughts but those two were enough to rob me of my sleep last night.

Well, if I haven't scared you away with the visual of Mr. Magoo then let me share my experience of dropping his sample off at the Fertility clinic to get checked.

My sweet hubby was in no way going to the clinic to make his deposit.  He talked me into taking it there for him.  That was fine by me and it was okayed by the clinic receptionist - as long as it was there within an hour of making an appearance.

Well, I made the appointment at "our" clinic which is very close to our house but for some reason a few days before our drop off appointment we received a call changing our drop off to another location.  Okay, fine with me.  They gave me the address and assured me that if there was any problem to just call.

D-Day arrives and I take off to the clinic with the package hidden it the white paper bag that has been decorated with butterflies and rainbows.  I know - you are thinking - what?  but our daughter thought it was Dad's lunch bag (since it had his name on it) and decorated it the night before.  Far be it for me to offer any other explanation and off I went with Daddies "lunch bag" to the fertility clinic.

Well this other location is a bit farther than our local clinic and time is of the essence so I knew I had to hurry.  Guess what, no gas!  Stop for a few minutes to put enough gas in my tank to get me there.  Back on the road with still 25 minutes to go.  I am starting to sweat!  I know I am still okay on time but nothing else can happen.

We (the package and I)  make it to the hospital where the clinic is supposed to be and after the third trip around the block I decide to park and go into the hospital.  There should be a directory or someone who can tell me where to go, right?  Nope!  Apparently, nobody works in the hospital information booth on Saturday.  I check the directory and there is nothing listed for this clinic.  Well, I decide to call their phone number and guess what - their phones are forwarded to the answering service.  Are you kidding?   I explain to the poor woman on the other end of the phone I just need directions.  Well, she can't help me - all she can do is take my information and page a doctor.  Are you kidding again?  Tick, tick, tick ---

She starts to take my information, name, date of birth, is this an emergency (YES!!!!)  but not life threatening, (it could be if someone doesn't get me some gosh darn directions), phone number, "okay you should receive a call back within 20 minutes"  - WHAT! Are you kidding - in 20 minutes all the fragile, little Mr. Magoo sperms will be 6 feet under and then we have to do this all over again in another 48+ hours. - UGH!!! Double UGH!

I hang up and start frantically walking around this surprisingly empty hospital.  Aren't there any sick people in this part of town?  That is when I spot a desk with a sign that says "Please Sign In - Someone Will Be With You In A Moment"  great that means that someone will come to check and see if someone has signed in, right?  Yes!  In a few moments here comes this sweet woman with a clip board.  She looked at me a little funny but I imagined that by then I might have looked a little frantic.  Plus, I was holding a white paper baggie with butterflies and rainbows drawn on it.

I told her my issue - she looked at the baggie again (very differently this time) and told me to follow the hallway farther down to the security guard office and they could show me the way.  A few minutes later I was in the fertility clinic.  By the way they do have a sign - the receptions pointed out when I told her my story.  I felt I shouldn't point out that it was the size of an 8x10 piece of paper and partially obscured by an azalea bush so it's kind of hard to read from the road which is 250 feet away, at least.

Well, the receptionist has me take a seat and in a few minutes I am saying goodbye to my little baggie.  That is when all the thoughts start popping into my head. The final thought is what if I didn't make it in time and they look at his sperm and say it is not any good because of all the delays that occurred when I was trying to make my delivery.  I guess we will find out tomorrow.  Now onto another sleepless night with all my thoughts whirling around in my head.

By the way - I never did receive a call back from the doctor.



Friday, April 6, 2012

Here goes......

Well, I am finally taking the leap and starting my own blog.  Now that I have sat down to do this I don't know where to start... so I will start at the beginning...  My husband and I have been married (mostly happily.....haha, honey) for almost 13 years.  Wow - that seems like a long time.  We have been blessed with two children, who are happy and healthy - and love spending time with each other (well, some of the time, I can always wish can't I   ;-)

My first pregnancy was smooth and uncomplicated right from the start and nine months later we were blessed with a big, big, bouncing baby boy.  The second time around not so smooth or uncomplicated.  My 18 week ultrasound revealed to our doctor that I had a complete placenta previa and that I was having a girl.  I was over the moon (about the girl part).  The previa - not so much.  My mom had had one with my brother and almost died - but after some "nothing to worry abouts" and "just take it easys" from the doctor I was okay - until about 2 weeks later when I woke up covered in blood - I know - yuk!  Believe me it was as gross and as terrifing as it sounds. The rest of the pregnancy was spent in the hospital on my back praying that I would not loose this bundle of joy.  
Even more good news - my previa was now an accreta.  Basically, my placenta had attached to my c-section scar and grown through my uterus and into my body.  Ugh! By the way - I was now thinking to myself - this little diva is making a lot of trouble for mommy!  

Well, luckily I had some angels sitting on my shoulder because 16 weeks and only a few scary moments later I had a bouncing baby girl.  I still remember the operating room filled with doctors (because apparently, this was a rare condition and also a learning moment for would-be obstetricians) and my OB leans over and says "I'm sorry but you have to have a hysterectomy - we can't save your uterus".  At the time I thought it was a fair trade - my uterus for a baby girl and I still think it was a fair trade. 

I have two beautiful children - I should be happy right?  I totally am - but I have always wanted a big family.  Not Duggar-sized (American reality TV for all international readers) but three or four little rug-rats running around and terrorizing the neighborhood would have been nice.  Well, I have spent the last six years looking at ways to expand our family.  International adoption - nope.  Domestic adoption - nope.  Surrogacy - yes!  Unfortunately, unless you are a movie star, have a Great-Aunt Gertrude who passes on and leaves you a mattress filled with $100 dollar bills, or have the good fortune of picking six willing Mega Millions numbers you are out of luck.  My husband absolutely refused to mortgage our house to the nines and drain our kids college funds.  He is the level headed one in this relationship - thank God!  Anyway, about two years ago I am trolling the internet looking for ways to make a few million and come across Surrogacy in India. What! Surrogacy where!  India!  Read a little more and hope is starting to blossom again.  Maybe......we.......could......still......have......another......baby!

Well, after some thorough research and budget analysis and plenty and plenty of praying we are finally about to start our journey.  Hopefully, our journey goes smoothly and successfully and along the way maybe we will make a few new friends.